Friday, September 16, 2005


Well, Bill and I are now in Amsterdam! Very exciting. Yesterday, we went to the Sex Museum, where I learned that American women invented anal sex, and that women especially are fascinated by bestiality and find it quite erotic. Hmm. I am pretty sure the Romans invented everything naughty, and as for my alleged prediliction for bestiality, well, just know that Hello Kitty is near and dear to my heart. I also learned that the only thing that has changed in pornography over the past two thousand years is the hairstyles.
Of course, after learning such shocking things we had to clear our heads and decided to partake in Amsterdam's most famous legal substance. I was quite worried about this as I feared that I would totally love smoking pot and feel that the last 10 years of my life were wasted as I rarely take part in such activities. While I did get much higher much quicker than in the good old US of A, I can't say I felt too bad about my wasted, or lack there of, years. However, Bill is a big wuss. But I will not tell about his pansyassedness.
Before Amsterdam, we were in Bonn and Cologne with actual Germans! Very exciting. We watched soccer and drank beer as one does, very fun. I met Bill's London Eye friend Jenni, who was our fantastic host and insured that we ate chocolate and crepes, which is ideal in a host.
So, that's the news. I reach America in 5 days, and turn 24 in 10. Too much excitement.


Bill McClain said...

It is sad that I cannot tell a lie...but if I could I would point out that I loved smoking pot and that I did not have any bad reactions, including a firm belief that if I worried enough about worrying, I would stop worrying forever. But I can't lie, so I won't.

wanderius thrax said...

all pot has done for me is make me phlegmy for about 9 hours straight.