Tuesday, July 10, 2007

ruth from redleather, hm.

So, last month, I watched others read from their youthful diaries at the inaugural LA Angst. I went with fellow graduate student girlfriend Michelle and had a lovely evening. Met people, etc.

This month, I agreed to read. And while back in Kansas City this past weekend, picked up some of my old diaries. It turns out that I was awfully lame. I was in love with a lot of people I can't really put a face to now. Still, the old heartbreak hasn't quite faded (why did Andrew not like me? Who was Jeff R. and why did he choose Courtney R. over me?! Was it really because I should lose 10 lbs?), and I am pretty apprehensive about selling out teenage me for cheap laughs! Sure, my alternating concern with boys and the nature of the universe ("Peter M. is so nice. And hot! Ha! We don't even have to talk about gay things like school and friends, we can talk about real things, like feelings" followed by "I think if I accept all of Christianity's conditions I'd be cheating my self [sic]. Much of Christianity seems hypocritical to me. I truley [sic] believe in God, and that he could very well fill my void, but I don't want to become a Christian just to fill the void").

And, in 8th grade, I addressed my diary as "compilation of my ruminations." That I will encourage you to laugh at. However, I am pretty sure that should I sit down to write about my relationship with spirituality today it would be as trite as the above.

Anyway, you might note that the LA Angst page says that "Ruth from Redleather" will be reading. I guess that means I should be giving my blog some more lovin'.

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