Thursday, February 09, 2006

When I am taken hostage

When I am taken hostage, which is highly likely since I don't even know how to use a gun at all, thus increasing the likelihood that I'll be kidnapped and unable to escape, I hope that I am strong and resolute and say things like "Never back down! Don't give into their maniacal demands" especially if their demands are more or less reasonable, like a box of Thin Mints (although they are becoming less and less reasonable every year).
This brings me to my second point, which is, I need to learn how to use a gun. Should I ever, you know, get taken hostage or end up in a horror movie. I have nightmares about staring down Freddy Krueger, trying to blow his brains out, and falling backward, thus meeting my death.
I just hope that should I ever end up in a life or death situation, my eyes turn to steel and my manner imperious.


Doug said...

guns are easy. making friends after you've used one not so much.

also, in response to your swearing army guys, i think you need to read less victorian lit and watch a modern army movie like 3 kings or something. people are idiots, military people doubly so.

ruth said...

hey, i don't even really like victorian lit. and the army guys in jane austen, whom i do like, are always swine. the only military fiction i do like is tim obrien, and those guys swear a lot. but then, there are rarel women present.
i should probably see 3 kings though.

DaintyDoughnuts said...

The only reason 3 Kings is worth watching is Mark Walberg. That guy is so hot its unfair.